Lady Manmyeong's Parenting Method

 

Lady Manmyeong Who Raised a Great General

Lady Manmyeong (萬明夫人) was the niece of King Jinheung (眞興王) of Silla and the mother of General Kim Yushin (金庾信). She was born into the royal Seonggol (sacred bone) lineage of Silla and married Kim Seohyeon (金舒玄), who was of Gaya royal descent. This marriage caused a significant issue in Silla, where lineage was highly valued. Due to her husband’s Gaya heritage, her son Kim Yushin was limited to the status of a local noble. However, Lady Manmyeong had a different perspective. She diligently raised her son Kim Yushin, who later became a key figure in Silla’s unification of the Three Kingdoms. He became the only person of Gaya descent to be treated as equal to a Silla king after his death. Let’s take a look at Lady Manmyeong’s method of educating her children.

Portrait of Lady Manmyeong. Source: Doopedia

Instilling Belief That Her Son Would Become a Great Man

When Lady Manmyeong was pregnant with Kim Yushin, she reportedly had a dream in which a child in golden armor rode a cloud into her home. This type of dream is called a “taemong” (胎夢), a prophetic dream indicating the birth of an important child. After having this grand dream, Lady Manmyeong believed that her child would grow up to do great things for the country. Thus, she dedicated herself to her son’s education. It seems that Lady Manmyeong applied the "Pygmalion effect," which suggests that positive expectations and attention can have a beneficial influence on a person, to Kim Yushin. Following his mother’s words, Kim Yushin came to believe that he was destined to be a great man. Once, after frequenting a courtesan’s house and neglecting his studies, he resolved never to return. However, while sleeping on his horse, the horse headed back to the courtesan’s house. Upon waking, Kim Yushin famously beheaded his horse, showing his determination to restrain himself.

 

Strictly Educating Her Son

During Kim Yushin’s time, Silla had an institution called the Hwarangdo (花郎徒), where young nobles aged 15 to 18 were selected based on their appearance to train in martial arts and moral discipline, becoming key figures in the unification of the Three Kingdoms. Kim Yushin also left home to join the Hwarangdo and studied diligently. However, he happened to meet a courtesan named Cheongwan and fell in love with her. This led him to neglect his studies and even spend nights at the courtesan's house. When Lady Manmyeong learned of this, she scolded him, saying, "I am already old. Day and night, I have hoped for you to grow up and achieve great things, bringing honor to the king and your parents. Yet now you spend your time playing with lowly children in courtesan houses and taverns?" She wept incessantly. Moved by his mother’s tears, Kim Yushin swore in front of her that he would never pass by that house again. This episode is recorded in the Samguk Sagi (三國史記). Without Lady Manmyeong’s strict education, Silla might not have had the great general Kim Yushin, and it might not have been able to defeat the powerful kingdoms of Baekje and Goguryeo.

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