How Should We Teach a Strong-Willed Child?

 

Persuading a Strong-Willed Child

A person who is excessively rigid often insists that their own thoughts are the only correct ones. While such a person may adhere to what they believe is right, they may find it difficult to collaborate harmoniously with others. If a strong-willed child believes that their way of learning is the best, they will likely refuse to compromise and continue to assert their method. During childhood, a parent’s authority may prevent the child from being overly stubborn, but as they reach adolescence, they tend to be more insistent on their ways. If this child continues to use ineffective learning methods, it could greatly hinder their academic performance. How, then, should such a child be taught?

souce : gpt-4

Persuade Through Discussions

Some children find it difficult to accept any opinions if they believe their experience and reasoning prove them right. As a child grows, when a parent tries to guide their learning, it’s essential to first ask the child how they plan to study. After hearing the child’s approach, if the parent foresees potential issues, they should engage the child in a discussion to persuade them. The child will assert their learning method, while the parent proposes a better approach, leading to a heated debate. The child will not easily be persuaded. It is only when the child recognizes the validity of the parent's arguments that they may begin to consider alternative viewpoints. To successfully persuade the child, parents must be thoroughly prepared before the discussion. They must remain calm, level-headed, and rational throughout the conversation. If the parent becomes emotional, not only will the discussion fail, but communication with the child may also break down.

 

Support the Child’s Method and Wait for Failure

If the parent cannot break the child’s stubbornness, they should support the child’s approach and wait. If persuasion through discussion fails, the parent should encourage and assist the child’s learning method. At this stage, parents need patience and respect for the child’s learning style. Without parental support, the child may attribute their failure to external factors. When the child’s method inevitably fails, leading to despair and uncertainty, the parent must have a backup plan and present alternatives. At this point, the child may accept the parent’s suggestions, but they may not act voluntarily. Since the child may lack confidence in the parent's proposed method, they may engage in the learning process passively. Parents should continuously check to see if the learning approach is working, listening attentively to their child’s experiences. Eventually, as the child achieves positive results and communicates with the parent about learning, they will begin to propose their ideas more thoughtfully. Over time, rather than stubbornly insisting on their way, the child will consult the parent’s opinions and carefully examine the most optimal approach for themselves.

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Abigail Smith Adams' Parenting Methods